You schedule plans with friends and important work meetings. But scheduling sex? It’s not as unromantic as you might think. In fact, putting a daily romp into your Google calendar could give your sex life the jolt it needs.
Take it from Good Morning Britain host Kate Garraway, who revealed that she schedules her sex sessions with the help of a spreadsheet. According to sex experts, she’s onto something.
In her 2017 book, The Joy of Big Knickers, Garraway shared how she and her husband went on a 14-day sex challenge that had them penciling sex into their schedule every single day for two weeks.
“When you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, the physical side of things can be very unspontaneous,” Garraway told The Sun. “So the idea is to schedule sex and force yourself to do it once a day and make it the focus of your diary.”
Okay, but does planned sex actually spice things up in the bedroom? Holly Richmond, PhD, a sex therapist in New York City, explained to Health that it really can make the action better and more adventurous.
“I prescribe this all the time to my couples,” says Richmond. “If a couple comes in to me and tells me they’re not having as much sex as they want, I tell them that the best way to get back on the horse is absolutely to schedule sex. And I know this doesn’t sound romantic, but what it’s about is building those habits and routines, and having sexuality be the norm.”
Richmond tells her clients that penciling in sex is a great short-term solution. But instead of 14 days straight, she says she typically advises couples to start with a more realistic goal of having sex three to four days a week.
Don’t think you can swing a sex session that often? Richmond says quickies are great, too—as long as you’re still managing one day a week to devote to least one hour of lovemaking.
“Fourteen days of sex can be a great challenge, but the main purpose of scheduling sex is to cultivate partnership and create a time they can look forward to,” says Richmond. “I recommend doing it at different times of the day so it doesn’t feel like a chore, but rather to recreate novelty.”
Richmond says that the idea of creating a “challenge” can add to the fun and help mix things up for couples who may still have enough sex yet really want to try something new.
With all this in mind, break out your daily planner—at the very least, scheduling sex is worth a go.